Personal life- work life

Soo..I've been a nanny for a 9 month old since she was 2.5months.
I work 40-45 hrs a week, 10hr days 3 days a week and 5 hr days 2 days a week.
I love my job & the family. It's been a very rewarding position. In my last position I was an administrator at a day care ; going from a busy 300+ child facility to being with 1 single child.. no coworkers, alone time etc. has been very lonely. Recently i've been going through a very bad breakup, as well as dealing with other personal issues in my home life.
I feel like i'm going crazy being in the house with a baby all day, so we try to get out and do various activities, even then that takes up only 1-2hrs of a 10hr+ day. Being that baby is still little there's not a big variety of things for us to do besides the library or park. With the weather where i'm from, those park days are quickly coming to an end.
I try to keep my mind busy by reading, being on my laptop etc. the baby still takes 3 naps a day all 1-2hrs long. Which leaves me with even more alone time.
Like I said nannying is very rewarding but lately I dread going into work, I find myself getting emotional in my down time etc. (side note: the family would never know that anything is even wrong, I put on a good face while i'm around them) I'd hate to make a rash decision and quit when I know I'd regret it as soon as things calm down.
I scheduled an appointment for counseling but unfortunately they're booked for another month.
I guess i'm writing all this to see how you guys handle working when dealing with personal issues? Do you find yourself lonely while nannying?
I know some people can tune it out, work is work. Which usually i'm pretty good at doing but lately I find myself looking for strategies to cope while working. I definitely don't want the family to know what i'm going through, or even have the baby sense that i'm upset. Figured i'd turn to the "nanny support group".

Comments

I choose nannying specifically because I don't want coworkers. So my pov may be different. Your NK is more than old enough to go to baby yoga, music class, dance class or similar. Baby music classes are just babies using objects to make as much noise as possible. While dance class is usually some variation of caspar babypants type free play. Many areas also have indoor gyms and the like. Check your area. You can also get the parents to sign up for children's museums or zoo/aquarium. Those outings are for the adults at first, but you will meet other nannies.

Strike up a conversation with other nannies at the park. You can then do playdates with each other.

IME, personal life can and does affect mood. If you have some available PTO take a few days off to recenter yourself. Even taking a couple of 3 day weekends in a row can make a big difference. Or ask to consolidate your two short days into one longer day so you can get an extra day off each week without losing pay

I too choose nannying... this post was not because I don't love my job or what I do, it was also not to seek out additional activities that I know the baby could be doing. It was simply to see how other nannies tune out their personal life stressors while at work when they have free time on their hands.
So let me clear this up...The family I work for does not want the baby on a lot of outings because baby is not on a schedule, there is no consistency from one day to the next. So they prefer activities that are more "drop- in" rather than sign up, and go at a scheduled time. After all, they'd hate to have to pay for a class that baby can't attend because she's sleeping at that time etc. So there are not a lot of drop -in options in our area.
The town we live in is mostly stay at home moms, who have formed their own little "cliques" so as easy as "going to the park & striking up conversation" sounds, it's not that simple. Lol. I have joined a local nanny group and have met up at the library a couple times with a nanny who's NK is my LO's age. My intentions were not to attract comments about finding nanny friends, or finding additional activities for baby to do. Trust me, if it were up to be she'd be in a baby class every other day! This is just for tips on how to keep busy at work and not spend to much time in my own thoughts.
I did speak with a "nanny friend" today at the library who was dealing with outside stressors, and only having 1 NK who is 4 months old, she too has a lot of down time and finds herself bored a lot; she recommended podcasts. She started listening to them in her downtime and says her week has been completely different.
Thank you for your insight.

I've been struggling with loneliness at work too! I've been with the same family for 2.5 years and being my own baby as well but lately I've been struggling with wishing I had adult conversation through out the day. I don't really have any tips as Ive found my self in the same situation lol! But, you're not alone! And over the years nannying (6 years nannying total) I've notice I kind of go in waves of feeling this way. Things will get better in your personal life which will make the down time and isolation at work go away too. I love your friends idea of pod casts!

It's always good to hear that i'm not the only one feeling like this. I agree that I too struggle with wishing I had some adult conversation.
It's good to know this feeling doesn't last, I think it will just be in a wave too! I'm sure it will pass, I appreciate your kind words

I don't have blanket advice for your whole post, but one thing that I think I can share to help is how I cope with depression and anxiety while on duty. Seeking help is important but:

I get absolutely LOST in their stage. By this I mean I get down on the floor, observe their play and start to figure out what they're thinking. When they were tiny (okay it helps that I have two to focus on/distract me), I'd just lay next to them looking at them and pondering what they could be thinking. I'd think about the colors of the room, the noises we can hear, talk about what I see and hear. Now that they actually play this is much more helpful. But try to get lost in the little moments, babies can be stressful but for the most part they're fascinating and I love trying to figure out how their brains work, what their internal thought process might be etc. And I use that to keep my adult mind from focusing on things I can't change or control.

And of course get out as often as possible. I've "trained" these two to accept long quiet walks. They don't expect to be entertained, they don't expect to be picked up/us to stop, and I can walk as long as I need to to clear my head. I don't know where you live but I'm in the pacific northwest and it rains all winter, we still go out. Maybe not to a playground cause butts would get wet but we go for walks at least once a day unless it's below freezing, if that's the kind of weather you have to deal with find your local mall and be a mall walker. Get lost in people watching and old ladies wanting to fawn over baby for a minute :) I am sorry about your struggles but we all have them and you'll find your way through.

I appreciate this. I never thought about the interactions with babies that way. I'm always down on the floor playing with her, but i'll have to start asking baby and myself some of those deeper questions. I'm sure it makes the day go by fast as well.

When the baby is napping can you do a yoga video. Or a meditation app for a few minutes? Obviously you still have to pay attention to the monitor!!

Would you be interested in taking a flexible on line class? Not for a grade or anything but to learn more about a hobby? Like a photography editor class or a writing work shop. There are a lot of on line nanny classes that are pretty interesting at nanny care hub.

Could you email or write a letter to an old friend or someone who lives out of town?

Are you allowed to cook your own meals so your dinner would be ready when you get home ( if you don't eat at work)

I'm sorry about your break up. I'm sorry you are feeling down and a little lonely.

When I have down time at work I like to read, do an exercise video, call my sister on the phone, send letters to my nieces and nephews- they all love mail even though we live pretty close by.

When I feel down I try to make sure I'm eating healthy, exercising, sleeping and waking at the same time each day.

I hope you feel better soon.

Thank you for your kind words and suggestions. I appreciate them all.
I never thought about doing a yoga or meditation video, I will look into that this week! I have thought about going back to school for a 2nd degree, and just taking my time and doing 1-2 classes online at a time. I started looking into that these past couple weeks actually, so hopefully that will give me something to focus on as well. That's so sweet that you send your nieces and nephews letters, kids love getting mail, (I know I did) I'll have to do something like that for my little cousins, nephews, and niece.
These were very helpful suggestions

I went through a bad break up when I first started working for my current family about 3 years ago. I told the mom what was going on. She was super supportive and helpful. We talked about it and she gave me my fridays of for a couple weeks to give me some time to clear my head. Also when I first started watching the little girl she was 14 months and took a 3-4 hour nap sometimes longer! I had a lot of down time. I would watch tv, read, or knit. I'm a big knitter and this time gave me plenty of time to work on projects. Do you have any hobbies you could do during this time? I also did the laundry and cleaned during this time.

I don't have too many hobbies, just reading but i'm definitely interested and will have to look further into finding a hobby to take up. Thank you for the suggestion!