Dealing with disrespectful children

I have been working with a family and they have a 7 year old boy. He is the most disrespectful person I have met in my life. He throws trash on the floor. I ask him to pick it up he says no and continues to throw wrappers on the floor. He is used to maids and babysitters cleaning up after their every mess. Also with toys, if he takes out a set of toys and I ask him to clean it he has a house he attitude "no I'm not going to pick it up, I'm not listening to you, you're not my mom" "I don't have to listen to you" I've tried everything and it's been a year. I'm tired of disrespect. How would you handle this.

Comments

Wow! I wouldn't deal with that! Over a year he should be respecting you by now. Doesn't seem like anything will change. I'd seriously quit and tell them in a "round the bush" way why. You shouldn't have to put up with that. Good luck!

Have you talked with his parents about it? Does he respect them?
My first thought is to address it with him and them together. "____ I want to talk with you and your parents about the way you have been behaving." And from there ask him if he knows what you're referring to. If he does right, then it proves he is consciously disrespecting you and it's clear you and parents need to set boundaries together right on the spot, including consequences for what he has already done. If he seems to not realize how he is making you feel, this is clearly behavior he has always been allowed to exhibit, and it beefs to be corrected immediately. He may need to hear from someone new how he is affecting you.
I have a feeling though, he will be combative. I think you're in a tough situation, and if the parents don't see a problem or help you with repairing it, you may need to look for a new position. This is your work, you are in charge and you deserve respect and compassion. Good luck!!!

I would aske the parents if you could have a time to sit down and talk to them about your concerns and the behavior issues you've been having. The boy is 7 so he's in school right? Maybes you can talk while he's in school. It may be that they don't know how to handle him either. I try marking a consistent plan for discipline and reinforce good behavior. My bosses and I are alway consistent with discipline whether I'm there or they are. We have the system of while I'm there I'm the boss and when I leave they are the boss. Also if they have set a punishment in place like no iPad for the day that means the whole day. If I take something away for the day the child is not allowed to have it back even when the parents get home. Good luck

I would aske the parents if you could have a time to sit down and talk to them about your concerns and the behavior issues you've been having. The boy is 7 so he's in school right? Maybes you can talk while he's in school. It may be that they don't know how to handle him either. I try marking a consistent plan for discipline and reinforce good behavior. My bosses and I are alway consistent with discipline whether I'm there or they are. We have the system of while I'm there I'm the boss and when I leave they are the boss. Also if they have set a punishment in place like no iPad for the day that means the whole day. If I take something away for the day the child is not allowed to have it back even when the parents get home. Good luck

If he throws trash on the floor and won't pick it up he can't go do anything he wants to do until the trash is picked up.

If he won't clean up a toy tell him fine but the toy will be put in time out until he is ready to clean up when asked. Then put the toy I time out. Even if the parents give it back you can take it away while you are there.

Don't be mean. Just set an expectation- explain the rule calmly explain the consequences and then follow through.

I agree with Annienannyo. Children need boundaries and a set of rules to follow. Have you outlined your rules in the past AND enforced them? I'm asking because following through with consequences is just as important as the rules themselves. When he throws his trash on the floor and refuses to pick it up are you giving in and picking it up for him? Anytime my NKs give me the" I don't have to listen to you" attitude I just simply remind them that when their parents are away, i'm in charge. They know that certain actions will get them a time-out, screen time taken away, or both. If you've tried everything like you stated then you certainly need to bring the parents in on this. This needs to be a team effort. Sometimes, if my NKs are acting really bad then I tell them that i'm going to call their parents and they can explain to their mom/dad why they are in trouble.