Leaving ...

Ok ... so if you have followed my story ... you probably want to slap me for still hanging in with the same family ... but I am at a breaking point...

The dynamics in the household ... parents and kid (I could go on forever...) have made me depressed. I always want to cry (or I get agitated first, then cry); I have trouble going and staying asleep and I just wish I could stay in bed all day with the covers pulled over my head; I have lost weight (not good ... I am tiny to begin with); my only true outlet ... hiking ... just isn't fun anymore .

I have not decided if I will wait to leave until I have a new job or if things get REALLY bad to leave after giving two weeks notice (without a job) ... I have a good friend who I can stay with for a couple of months if I need to leave ...

At least I have learned a lot about myself, what I am looking for, and what to look out for ...
I am looking for a live OUT (I am a live in and seem to work 14 hr days ... but only can put down 8 ... because I only work/get paid when the need me, but I must be on call 24/7). I also want children who are toddler age (I am caring for a narcissistic preteen). And more ...

So I will keep you updated when my departure is set ... I promise ...

Comments

My advice? Mental/emotional health is more important than any amount of money. And you weren't paid well to begin with. So leave. Stay with your friend. And job hunt. The relief you'll feel when that stress is gone will be worth the job search anxiety. Heck, even a fill-the spot job like barista/retail worker will seem better until you get the correct nanny job.

In the meant time, go on an application frenzy. Look online and apply, apply apply!

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR WORDS, SUPPORT AND CONCERN.

So I had a birthday this past weekend. The family wanted to take me out. Mind you I went to CULINARY SCHOOL ... they took me to pizza. Yes, it was some gourmet place, but really?! Then when we got there, they asked the kid what he wanted to order ... What was I to do but to say thank you ... I would have rather stayed at home by myself. Then I felt guilty because they gave me a nice gift certificate.

But you are right. I was in a hard spot financially before I got this job (food stamps, food banks ...) I have saved a lot, but it is hard to give up the financial comfort...but I know it is the right thing.

I have suffered from depression since I was a teen ... it got worse when I was in college ... then it became more manageable with years of therapy ... so I know the signs and am not in denial.

I have been applying for jobs like crazy. And yes, I will leave if I can't at least get bites.

I cannot thank you again for your support. Though I don't always respond to what people write, I hope all you know that you are not alone out there. I am so grateful for this site. I have friends who are understanding, but it is this site that people understand!

Yes, I definitely think you need to give notice now! It sounds like you have Classic signs of depression and depression only gets worse, if left untreated. This could be Situational depression, your situation is bringing you down. Live in nannies never work. They sound great at interview, but literally parents turn you into a slave 24/7. They make us do slave work while living out. No pay for over 8 hours is illegal whether you live in or not!!!! Hopefully, you have saved money. I would give them a 2 week notice and get out of there now. You did not say if you had a Contract? Do what the contract stipulates and that way you filled your requirement and then some. They may get mean and will be angry and hurt, who cares. Take care of yourself first. People replace nannies daily. Take up the Offer by your friend before she/he changes their minds. Really think if this Nanny Job is what you want. It is Always Hard to quit and move on, but this family is doing Illegal Stuff and that is Not Right. Get out in Two Weeks. If the anxiety and depression continues After you move, see a doctor. Any medical M.D. can treat depression, just be honest and open about how you are really feeling, after you leave. I have quit Many Jobs. Better to be the dumper than the dumpee, I say. Good luck to you and keep in touch. miss pat

Leave now. Since you have a place to go get out. Also this time of year you can find temp work easily- quit. Work out your notice and then move to your friends. Get your resume ready and start looking. While you look let other mom's know you are available for date night, or during school breaks ( mom's can shop while you have the kids). Let people know you can work New Years ( always a big money maker).

Get out. You will feel so much better.

I want to say again that we do support you. And think the best course is leaving
I promise, even a temp position ANY where else will be better. A lot of places are hiring temp help. Get in and so some other work. And apply to nanny positions on your down time, but give notice

This family isn't nice.