Nanny Share! I love one family but hate the other!


Hi Everyone,
so I have been working at my current job as a nanny for a few months now. And ever since I started I noticed that one of the two families gives me a lot of trouble. The mom of that one family, works from home. So she's always sitting around us, constantly bossing me around and being very passive aggressive towards me. She basically treats me like I'm her servant girl. This lady has also has tried to cheat me out of my money several times and feels like I should not be able to have any days off or sick leave.
Even though it's been already agreed upon before when I started the job.

I have tried to talk to her about my concerns, but she gets very defensive and other times she acts like she's about to cry. I have also tried to mention it to the other family about my concern. Because both of the families are best friends. But still, very little to no change. The other family that I like has told me that they really like me and they do not want to lose me. What should I do? Should I continue to look for another job? Or should I talk to the family that I like, and tell them that I do not get along with the other family and I just want to work for the family that I like?


I would try talking with the family that you like. Just explain to them that the other family just isn't a good fit. If they understand (which they should because you said that they like you) then you can continue to work for them without the other family. If you don't think they will be understanding then I'd wait to secure a better position and then give your notice to both families. That's a tough situation but you need to look out for yourself! No one else will unfortunately.

Another thing that I wanted to add is that it might be awkward but this is your job! You don't owe anything to either of these families so don't let them guilt you into staying longer or guilt you into keeping the family you don't like. Be firm and professional. They will respect you for voiceing your concerns.

I am also a share nanny. I have fired share families in the past when it wasn't a good fit. That's one of the reasons I love shares so much. You have so much more control. I would sit the family you do like down. And tell them that you feel it's not a good fit. You can tell them that you want to give notice to the poor fit NF and find a new share family.

I have found that friendships btwn the share nfs isn't a good idea. It makes it hard for them to be objective. It's very easy to add a new family into the share. If I were you, I'd look around and see if families are starting to look. many families post on FB groups. Search your city. It's generally (City name)Nanny parent connection/ Parent Nanny group.

EVERY time, I've decided to leave one half of the share, my NF has followed me. Because they KNOW how vital I am to their kid.

If you do not have a contract in writing with the second mom and do not need the money, then give two weeks notice and quit. She will call the other mom anyway, if they are friends, and then you can tell your side of the story. I just cannot work for people who are rude, mean and disrespect me like that. I have quit two nanny jobs because of ill treatment from mothers and I did not have another job lined up. It just doesn't pay to be mean to me. We are not Servants, but professional child care nannies who love our work. We go to homes of people we do not know to Help Them and not be disrespected like that! So sorry for you, but I would start looking for another family. I have worked for two families at the same time, as one needed 3 days, the other 2 days, and I needed 5 days. Both were baby families and they Did Not know each other. It was Hard going to Two houses each week, but I did it for 2 years and they both were very good to me and we are still friends. Please don't stay and be abused, you deserve much more! Keep us posted. miss pat