Keep being attacked by 7 year old/how to know when to quit?

I've nannied two girls ages 4 and 7 for almost a year now. At first they were great then began throwing more tantrums, but nothing too crazy. But in the past couple months the 7 year old has started biting me, throwing things at me, scratching me, punching me, basically attacking me in anyway possible. She's also threatened me saying things like "I wish you were dead" or "I'm gonna torture you until you start crying" or "I'm gonna kill you". I don't know how many times things like these have happened but it's been two consecutive days this week (and I only watch them for about 3 hours a day) and has happened many other times before in the past few months. The attacks usually last for about 30 minutes and only stop because her mom gets home or I finally get her to go in time out. I've tried everything from telling her I'd take away TV to implementing a reward system for when she's good. Nothing works. Today I left with scratches on my face and arms and I've had bruises from her biting me for a while. I know the parents are probably trying but nothing is working and she keeps doing this. Should I put in a notice now or wait a little bit longer? Or is this even worth quitting over?


This child sounds disturbed in my opinion. A 7 year old definitely knows right from wrong by now. A 2 year old knows that hitting isn't right! Her telling you that she wishes you were dead is way too much. Do the parents know exactly what is going on? If not they absolutely should know. Tell them what she does to you and what she says to you and suggest that she see a therapist. That might be a touchy subject. I do have a couple of questions. What seems to be causing her to start a tantrum? I'm not saying this is your fault but if she's acting out it could be for a magnitude of reasons. Maybe she's bored, tired, or feels ignored and she's doing this for attention. The biting, hitting, and scratching thing has to stop. I would never put up with that. If I were you I would let the parents know that unless they can get their child help then you cannot work for them as you're coming home injured. Not okay.

The tantrums start when I have to tell her to do something she doesn’t want to do. Usually cleaning up or doing her homework. Her mom said she would take her to a therapist a while ago but never followed up on it. I even gave her a reccomendation. I’m looking for other jobs and will probably leave once I find one as there are other issues with working for them as well.

A little whining here or there is normal but a full on tantrum with aggressive behavior at 7 is not normal. I'm glad you're looking for other positions! I hope the parents follow up with that therapist.

Do they have a nanny camera? If so you should ask to watch the footage with the parents and the 7 year old. If they don't ask for permission to set up a camera in the room and record away.

It's not normal or acceptable and the 7 year old seems to understand that or she wouldn't stop once the parents get home.

If she is biting you and she breaks the skin I'd got to a doctor and charge the parents the fee.

Clearly the child is upset- does she do this at school? Does she act this way to Hernandez parents? She might need a little help figuring out why she's acting that way and how to channel those strong emotions into an appropriate outlet.

I would tell the parents if they aren't willing to record and discuss you will give notice and durning your notice I would call them to come home if she gets physically violent.