I'm done. And at this point, I feel it is not fair to the kids for me to be their caregiver. However it's, slightly more complicated than that...
So I am a full time nanny to a 4y (tomorrow!), a 2y5m and they're expecting a newborn in late march/early April. I've been with them for the last almost 2 ½ years now and absolutely love them. They at dream children and although it was rough at first, I've come to really appreciate their parents.
Over the course of the time I've been with them, we've done a share off and on with MB's twin sisters kids who live around the corner. They are 5 and 2y4m. I watch them 2-3 days a week and they have another older nanny who watches them the other days (she's an old family friend who the dad has known since his childhood). It's always been that this share arrangement goes on for a few months and then they work something else out and then that doesn't work out so they come back to me again. I don't mind the share - I've always been a share nanny so it doesn't phase me to have multiple kids from different families/very close in age. The problem is that our "parenting" views are different. I believe in fostering independence and responsibility, while they are still spoon feeding the 5 year old. I'm not judging or anything. But it's very difficult to have a child who spends 5 days being waited on hand and foot with no structure or discipline at all and then come spend 2 days with us. It's frustrating for all of us - especially the 2y4m cousin. It was fine when he was a baby but now that he's a full on toddler, I'm not really okay with letting him do whatever he wants and not having any desire to follow our rules... especially with 3 other kids.
I do get paid significantly more with the cousins.. $26/hr vs $20.. but I just find myself feeling like it's more work and stress than it's worth. I'm leaving more and more often unbelievably frustrated and I'm just over it. I'm just so turned off by him and his brother. I've posted about the 5 year old several times about our communication issues and my struggle with him. The 2 year old is literally the grossest person I've ever come in contact with. I know it's really not his fault but it really doesn't help any. He's constantly drooling - like spit pouring out of his mouth - and he always has his hands in his mouth so he's constantly just wet everywhere - STILL. I've never been so repulsed by a dirty diaper - the smell is unreal. He naturally has smell that just doesn't agree with me, I've even tried bathing him because I thought maybe he just was dirty.. no, it's his natural smell. Today was icing on the cake - I changed his diaper and then took the crew to the 4 year olds hour long gymnastics class. We came straight home afterwards and I made them lunch. I go to put the cousin in his seat and immediately want to throw up from his smell. Then I realize he is SOPPING wet, like dripping. I realize it's not his fault but after already feeling defeated because for some reason everyone decided it was ignore and/or stare as if I were speaking Chinese today... so I get him cleaned up and admittedly had a grumpy attitude about it. Then the cable guy came to fix the tv since my normal people just moved into this house this week, so I'm helping him. I go to get everyone ready for nap and the cousin is COVERED in nasty chewed up food. Like I immediately thought he had thrown up. But he didn't smell like barf and there wasn't any anywhere.. so I realize he had been chewing his food with his hands in his mouth and then spreading the chewed up remnants ALL OVER the kitchen - which I realized after I had put him in bed.
It's just been a very full day of "Are you freaking kidding me??"
The dad is super disrespectful and awful - stereotypical cop, super arrogant and just awful. I hate their house haha it's so gross - like they've literally never cleaned a day they've been here. They have a maid who comes twice a month but... no. And I'm not here to deep clean their house AND struggle with their kids and be treated like crap by their dad. I hate their dog. He's gross and annoying haha I've posted several times about all the car seat struggles I've had with this family as well. It's awful. And I HAVE to drive the 4 of them in their car because mine only has 3 back seats and I have to drop off and pick up THEIR son from school. It's just all around a super annoying and frustrating situation and I'm finally at the point where I want to be done with the cousins.
My problem is I don't know how to quit them and not the other kids. I thought about using the new baby as an excuse but that is too far away I think.... ugh. Anyone have any suggestions or advice?